December 31, 2014

December 31, 2014

Two years ago, we were eating stuffed mushrooms and drinking Pineapple-Orange Martinis, putting the finishing touches on Osso Buco and Saffron Risotto, opening a bottle of Veuve and wishing everyone a Very Happy New Year. One year ago, we were sitting in a house full of devastated people trying to grasp what had happened that afternoon and not finding any meaning. The image of a raw open grave and a life cut far too short overpowered everyone. This year, just another Wednesday night. Next year …?

As we approach one more totally arbitrary moment on the time-space continuum, a moment only made significant by a certain group of people who mark time using a particular system of reckoning, I wonder in what way, if any, tomorrow will differ from today, other than the changing of one number in the naming of the year for another. For millions of people on this planet, this is just a December evening, and for many, it is not even called December. Whatever you call it, and however you mark it, I wish you all a season of peace in the coming days.

For all the parents, members of this terrible club, I especially wish you whatever windows of peace you can find. As I read recently, “Sorrow is no longer the islands but the sea.” May you find landfall on the islands of tranquility, and if not tranquility, at least some brief respite from your journey, as you traverse this ocean of heartbreak upon which we have been cast adrift.

About edcol52

The Infinite Fountain of Love and Loss flows unceasingly into the pool of memory and sorrow. I created this blog in response to the most dreadful tragedy every parent fears, the death of a child, our 24 year old son, Jake. We are now on an unimagined journey along this road of grief and recovery. If you can find some comfort within these pages, than I will have succeeded in some small measure.
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7 Responses to December 31, 2014

  1. miragreen says:

    Wishing you and your family peace whenever possible.

  2. edcol52 says:

    Thank you, Mira. We wish you the same.

  3. The Chic Geek says:

    Tara and I have been praying for your family at this anniversary time of Jake’s passing. There is no greater sadness than losing a child. Jake’s time here on this earth was cut too short and we think of him often and miss him. I wanted to send you and Jake’s mom a warm hug, love, and wishes for a peaceful heart from Kelly and Tara. Your blog is a beautiful tribute to Jake. I know he would be proud of you!
    Kelly and Tara Call

  4. Pingback: December 31, 2015 | The Infinite Fountain

  5. Jackie Francik says:

    Wishing you as much peace as possible in the new year….thank you for your blog Ed. My daughter Anna’s 26th birthday is January 6, 2016. We lost her August 12, 2014. I can not speak of her in the past tense. From reading your posts, I know you feel the loss of your son Jake as I feel the loss of Anna – it is an unending anguish, a void, an absence that is ever present.
    Thank you for putting my feelings into words.

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