Everything Doesn’t Happen for a Reason

This excellent essay has been making the rounds. It is well written and anyone who is grieving knows it is true. To imply that there is some higher reason for our tragedies does not lessen our pain or make it any more intelligible, and it is nonsense.  During those first horrible months after Jake’s death, I groped for any reason that would explain why he had to go. I read somewhere that even if there was a reason, there is no reason good enough for this to have happened. There is no understanding, there is no acceptance, there is only acknowledgement. Yes, this happened, and now my job is to keep on as best I can. It is something I will never get over.

Some things in life cannot be fixed. They can only be carried. ”

I will carry the grief and loneliness Jake’s departure wrought for as long as I live. It isn’t that the burden has lessened, I have become more inured to its crushing weight, have adjusted my pace to keep from collapsing.  So I plod along, one step at a time, with the weight of the world on my shoulders. And that’s just the way it is. There is no “getting over it”, no “moving on”, it doesn’t “get better”, it just is.

Everything Doesn’t Happen for a Reason

About edcol52

The Infinite Fountain of Love and Loss flows unceasingly into the pool of memory and sorrow. I created this blog in response to the most dreadful tragedy every parent fears, the death of a child, our 24 year old son, Jake. We are now on an unimagined journey along this road of grief and recovery. If you can find some comfort within these pages, than I will have succeeded in some small measure.
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