It has been nearly two months since I visited these pages. For some reason, the imperative to write is strangely absent. I have had thoughts of writing about Passover, Mother’s Day, the onset of the summer with Father’s Day, a string of birthdays that we won’t celebrate, ideas have popped into my head, but I lack the will to actually sit and pound out the few hundred words necessary.
I came across this today and thought I would share it. This mother echoes much of what I have written, and for the record, it holds just as true for Fathers.
I have has a few dreams where Jake has visited, and a friend of his just had a visit from him in her dream last week. He is around. He is still with us. That will never change. But underneath it all, I guess what has kept me from writing anything coherent is that I miss him so terribly much, it is debilitating sometimes. No, all the time. It is the sometimes that I can overcome that disability and go on with the semblance of normality my life has become.
I expect this is another phase I am going through, and one day soon, I will pour eloquence onto the page as never before. We’ll see.