Category Archives: Daily Ramblings

Who Am I?

Originally posted on MourningAmyMarie:
Something is over. In the deepest levels of my existence something is finished, done. My life is divided into before and after. — Lament for a Son, Nicholas Wolterstorff I am unable to re-read my early…

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The Akeidah

God said to Abraham, “Kill me a son” Abe says, “Man, you must be puttin’ me on” God say, “No”, Abe say, “What?” God say, “You can do what you want Abe, but The next time you see me comin’ … Continue reading

Posted in Ceremony, Daily Ramblings, Jake Colman, Observations | Tagged , , , , , , , | 3 Comments

Here it Comes. Here it Is. There it Goes.

Last Thursday was Rosh Hashanah, the Jewish New Year. Early last week I had it in mind to write a post about the impending holiday, but for reasons described elsewhere, I didn’t. Now that the first of the High Holy … Continue reading

Posted in Ceremony, Coping, Daily Ramblings, Grief, Jake Colman, Sadness | Tagged , , , , | 7 Comments

The Tiniest and Most Random Details

We get dozens of catalogs in the mail every week. I was leafing through one of them the other day, the Fall catalog from Sur La Table, an upscale cookware and kitchen supply company. It has the usual Le Creuset … Continue reading

Posted in Coping, Daily Ramblings, Grief, Memory, Sadness | 5 Comments

Jake’s Birthday

Yesterday was Jake’s 25th birthday. Somehow we made it through without imploding, vaporizing, or disintegrating. We went for juicy pastrami sandwiches dripping with coleslaw on fresh crusty rye for lunch at Langer’s, an old-school deli in downtown LA. Jake would … Continue reading

Posted in Coping, Daily Ramblings, Food, Friends and Family, Healing, Honoring Jake, Jake Colman, Jake's Spirit, Memory | 6 Comments

Two Birthdays

One of the perks of being Jewish is that you have two birthdays. The calendar we are most familiar, actually called the Gregorian calendar, is a solar-based calendar and divides each year up into the familiar 365 days, 52 weeks, … Continue reading

Posted in Ceremony, Daily Ramblings, Food, Friends and Family, Honoring Jake, Jake Colman, Jake's Spirit, Sadness | Tagged , , , | 8 Comments

Losing My Voice

Where does the time go? I have read that it takes 21 days to create a habit. That is if you want to start doing something, do it consistently for 21 days, and you will create the habit to continue … Continue reading

Posted in Daily Ramblings, Friends and Family, Grief, Honoring Jake, Jake Colman, Memory, Observations, Poetry, Progress | Tagged , , , , | 4 Comments

The Physical Toll of Grief

Yesterday was June 28th. Exactly six months, twenty-six weeks, since our beloved son died. Twenty-six joyless Shabbats. Twenty-six dreaded Saturday mornings. One hundred eighty-two days I have had to live in this world without Jake. It still doesn’t seem possible. … Continue reading

Posted in Coping, Daily Ramblings, Grief, Progress, Sadness | Tagged , , , , | 8 Comments

Father’s Day, 2014

Yesterday was another first. My first Father’s Day without my son. To rephrase that, my first Father’s Day without my son alive. As days go, it was okay, difficult but okay. I dedicated the day to my son, Jake, who … Continue reading

Posted in Ceremony, Daily Ramblings, Food, Honoring Jake, Jake Colman, Memory | Tagged , , , , | 5 Comments

Sometimes, It’s the Most Unexpected Things

We have a small guest house attached to our home. Jake lived back there on and off during various phases these last several years. When we went to collect his belongings from Palm Springs last December, we just put everything … Continue reading

Posted in Daily Ramblings, Grief, Honoring Jake, Jake Colman, Jake's Spirit, Memory, Sadness | Tagged , , , , | 10 Comments