Author Archives: edcol52

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About edcol52

The Infinite Fountain of Love and Loss flows unceasingly into the pool of memory and sorrow. I created this blog in response to the most dreadful tragedy every parent fears, the death of a child, our 24 year old son, Jake. We are now on an unimagined journey along this road of grief and recovery. If you can find some comfort within these pages, than I will have succeeded in some small measure.

So Many Words

Posted on March 28, 2014 by edcol52

Today is the 3-month anniversary of Jake’s death. It is still difficult to believe he is gone. In these past three months, I have written many words, this post will take me past the 30,000 mark, posted hundreds of pictures, … Continue reading →

Posted in Ceremony, Coping, Daily Ramblings, Friends and Family, Golf, Honoring Jake, Jake Colman, Memory | Tagged , , , , , | 3 Comments

Going Through the Motions

Posted on March 23, 2014 by edcol52

There are several physical actions that take place during the Orthodox prayer service. One stands, sits, and bows at various places, to name a few. The actual words have lost much of their meaning for me, some of the phrases … Continue reading →

Posted in Ceremony, Coping, Jake Colman, Sadness | 8 Comments

Fixing Shiva

Posted on March 22, 2014 by edcol52

Shiva is the seven days immediately following a Jewish burial. It is the very beginning of the mourning process, a process that can take a lifetime. Typically, the mourners stay at home, and members of the community come to call. … Continue reading →

Posted in Blog, Ceremony, Friends and Family, Grief, Kindness, Other Media, Support | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 3 Comments

Ojai Vignettes, Part 1

Posted on March 18, 2014 by edcol52

Driving north on Highway 1 again. Through the same blackened and blasted landscape of six weeks ago. Today, the charred hillsides wore the gauzy green mantle of new growth that signifies Spring in California. My internal landscape was slightly less … Continue reading →

Posted in Daily Ramblings, Food, Honoring Jake, Jake Colman, Memory, Photography, Sadness | Tagged , , , , , , , | 9 Comments

Save yourself: write now, tomorrow, or whenever

Posted on March 17, 2014 by edcol52

Yet another grieving parent on this lonely road. These are wise words. There is healing in pouring yourself out onto a page, no matter if anyone reads it or not. Private journal, public posting, scribble on a cocktail napkin, but … Continue reading →

Posted in Jake Colman | Leave a comment

You’re Okay, I’m Not Okay

Posted on March 15, 2014 by edcol52

What do I say to the person who asks, “How are you doing?” The question is such a reflexive conversational device. People ask without even thinking. Most of them listen to the reply without really hearing what you are saying, … Continue reading →

Posted in Coping, Daily Ramblings, Friends and Family, Grief, Jake Colman, Sadness, Support | Tagged , , , , | 9 Comments

Another Voice in the Chorus

Posted on March 15, 2014 by edcol52

Originally posted on Grief: One Woman's Perspective:
The suicide of Rick and Kay Warren’s son made headline news a year ago. Rick is the founder and senior pastor of Saddleback Church, one of the largest churches in America, and…

Posted in Blog, Friends and Family, Grief, Healing, Jake Colman, Kindness, Memory, Other Media, Support | Tagged , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Exactly the Same and Completely Different

Posted on March 12, 2014 by edcol52

As I have noted, many of the blogs I read resonate with me. All of the parents in the “lost children” club use many of the same words, metaphors, and analogies to describe their experiences. Externally, we seem to be … Continue reading →

Posted in Coping, Daily Ramblings, Friends and Family, Grief, Healing, Jake Colman, Support | Tagged , , , , , | 4 Comments

Where Are the Dads?

Posted on March 10, 2014 by edcol52

I have been out in the ‘grieving parent blogosphere’ for a while now. There are a lot of mothers posting the most beautifully eloquent writings about their experiences, their lost children, the struggle to rebuild their shattered lives. So far, … Continue reading →

Posted in Coping, Healing, Jake Colman, Kindness, Progress, Support | Tagged , , , , , , , | 9 Comments

Empathy versus Sympathy

Posted on March 10, 2014 by edcol52

Originally posted on MourningAmyMarie:
What is the best way to ease someone’s pain and suffering? Quick fixes don’t work. Especially when it comes to dealing with a loved one or friend who is grieving. Reminding them to count their blessings…

Posted in Coping, Friends and Family, Healing, Jake Colman, Support, Video | 3 Comments