Author Archives: edcol52

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About edcol52

The Infinite Fountain of Love and Loss flows unceasingly into the pool of memory and sorrow. I created this blog in response to the most dreadful tragedy every parent fears, the death of a child, our 24 year old son, Jake. We are now on an unimagined journey along this road of grief and recovery. If you can find some comfort within these pages, than I will have succeeded in some small measure.

Kaddish

Posted on January 28, 2014 by edcol52

Today I went to shul to say Kaddish for Jake on the one month anniversary of his death. The Mourner’s Kaddish is one of the most famous prayers in all of Judaism. What is unusual for a prayer said in … Continue reading →

Posted in Ceremony, Coping, Daily Ramblings, Honoring Jake, Jake Colman, Jake's Spirit, Memory, Observations, Tragedy | Tagged , , , , , | 11 Comments

Relativity

Posted on January 27, 2014 by edcol52

Tomorrow, it will be one month since that dreadful telephone call. The details of which are seared into my memory for all time. It is all so fresh, I can’t believe the time has passed. But time is always relative. … Continue reading →

Posted in Coping, Daily Ramblings, Friends and Family, Grief, Healing, Jake's Spirit, Memory, Support, Tragedy | Tagged , , , , , , , | 3 Comments

These Days

Posted on January 26, 2014 by edcol52

At times, these days, I’m certain that I hear Or think I hear your tread upon the floor But when I glance from ‘neath my silent tear ‘Tis but a breath of air, and nothing more. Do I now sense … Continue reading →

Posted in Coping, Daily Ramblings, Grief, Honoring Jake, Memory, Poetry, Tragedy | Tagged , , , , , , | 5 Comments

The Art of Presence – New York Times Article

Posted on January 26, 2014 by edcol52

Here is a link to a great article about helping people who grieve. As I wrote earlier, just being there is often enough, but when it isn’t, here are some guidelines for action. There is an interesting point made about … Continue reading →

Posted in Coping, Daily Ramblings, Friends and Family, Grief, Healing, Kindness, Print Article, Support, Tragedy | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Shabbat #4

Posted on January 25, 2014 by edcol52

Yesterday was mostly uneventful. Which, right now, is a good thing. We had our ‘California Breakfast’ of grapefruit and oranges from the tree, yogurt and bananas and strong black coffee, on the patio. Our friends, the birds, flitted about and … Continue reading →

Posted in Ceremony, Coping, Daily Ramblings, Friends and Family, Grief, Jake's Spirit, Memory, Observations, Tragedy | Tagged , , , , , , , | 3 Comments

Duck Billed Platitudes

Posted on January 24, 2014 by edcol52

There is a reason that during the traditional shiva, the 7 days of mourning following the funeral of a loved one, visitors to the shiva house are not supposed to speak to the mourners. There is absolutely nothing anyone can … Continue reading →

Posted in Coping, Daily Ramblings, Friends and Family, Grief, Healing, Observations, Support, Tragedy | Tagged , , , , , , | 7 Comments

The Teacup

Posted on January 22, 2014 by edcol52

We drove north on Pacific Coast Highway from LA to Ojai yesterday. Passing through the familiar stretch above the Ventura county line. The mottled cloud cover turned the ocean a flat leaden gray, and drained all the color out of … Continue reading →

Posted in Grief, Memory, Observations, Tragedy | Tagged , , , , , , | 7 Comments

A Peculiar Paradox

Posted on January 21, 2014 by edcol52

Somehow, I have not yet been able to reconcile the fact that our son is truly gone with the fact that he seems so close at times. I look at the belongings we brought back from Palm Springs, three huge … Continue reading →

Posted in Coping, Daily Ramblings, Friends and Family, Grief, Healing, Jake's Spirit, Memory, Tragedy | Tagged , , , , , , | 6 Comments

Marking Time

Posted on January 21, 2014 by edcol52

January 18 I mark time very differently now. There is the ‘Before’ and the ‘From Now On’. Very different lives. My expectations have been dashed, it is difficult to let them go. Thankfully, we have a marvelously strong, caring and … Continue reading →

Posted in Coping, Friends and Family, Grief, Jake Colman, Past Facebook Post, Progress, Tragedy | Tagged , , , , , | Leave a comment

At the Seaside

Posted on January 21, 2014 by edcol52

January 17 I am sitting by the shore of an infinite ocean. The sun shines down on the golden sand where children splash in the shallow, gentle waves, parents watching their antics. Young men play with frisbees, pretty girls sun … Continue reading →

Posted in Coping, Daily Ramblings, Grief, Past Facebook Post, Poetry, Tragedy, Visions | Tagged , , , , , , , | 2 Comments